Mud Bath Grievance Email

Subject: Urgent: Pertaining to the Substandard Quality of Mud Allocation

Dear Mr. McGregor,

I am writing to formally lodge a complaint regarding the consistently unacceptable quality of the mud provided for bathing purposes here at Sunny Acres Farm. As you know, a proper mud bath is not merely a luxury, but a vital component of swine hygiene and overall well-being.

However, recent mud allocations have been, frankly, an insult to my refined porcine sensibilities. The mud is too thin, lacking the necessary viscosity to provide adequate coverage. I suspect excessive watering down, a practice I find deeply concerning. Furthermore, the grit-to-mud ratio is simply off. I've unearthed pebbles the size of acorns during my soaks, which is both uncomfortable and frankly, beneath me.

This is impacting morale. Gertrude refuses to wallow at all now, and Wilbur keeps complaining about inadequate skin exfoliation. I implore you to address these issues immediately, perhaps by sourcing a higher-quality clay base or implementing a more rigorous mud-mixing protocol. The happiness of your pigs, and the quality of our mud baths, are inextricably linked.

Sincerely (and with a distinct lack of mud-induced serenity),

Bartholomew, Resident Pig and Mud Connoisseur.